I Take You Page 15

  A girlfriend remarked, within the thick of the maelstrom, ‘Nikki, you will look back on this time at your grave, and you will laugh.’ I couldn’t see it then, but gradually, over the years, could. Because what I found in the long run was that honesty connects; that there’s an incredible potency to telling the truth. People respond, movingly. It was empowering to have women say things like ‘Thank you for writing my words,’ or ‘Thank you for saying the things I’ve never been able to articulate.’ They did, for years afterwards. In fact still are.

  And so it has come to pass. I’m a different woman now, a different writer. Looser, lighter, not so concerned about what people think of me. I found my courage through a book I didn’t want anything to do with. It took a long time. My publishers very much wanted a sequel, for this book did well for them. As for me, I wasn’t so sure, for years and years afterwards. The problem, or ‘challenge’, as my rousing editor preferred to see it, was in replicating the feeling of reckless liberation I’d had when writing anonymously. But over a decade I grew up. Let go. Strengthened. Loosened. Didn’t give a damn anymore about what people thought of me, and I think that’s one of the liberations of middle age. I found my voice. My courage. My boldness. The follow-up came swift and strong and cheeky and sure, just as Bride had. Because it’s telling the truth, once again. It’s got my name on the cover. And it feels great.

  About the Author

  Nikki Gemmell is the author of The Bride Stripped Bare, the original publication of which sparked tremendous media interest. Both The Bride Stripped Bare and its follow-up With My Body went on to become huge bestsellers. Nikki Gemmell has written eight novels and regular columns for the Mail on Sunday and the Australian Weekend Magazine.

  For further information: nikkigemmell.com

  By the Same Author

  FICTION

  Shiver

  Cleave (published in the US as Alice Springs)

  Lovesong

  The Bride Stripped Bare

  The Book of Rapture

  With My Body

  NON-FICTION

  Pleasure: An Almanac for the Heart

  Why You Are Australian

  Honestly: Notes on Life

  Copyright

  Fourth Estate

  An imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers

  77–85 Fulham Palace Road

  Hammersmith

  London W6 8JB

  www.4thestate.co.uk

  First published in Great Britain by Fourth Estate 2013

  Copyright © Nikki Gemmell 2013

  ‘Anonymity’ © Nikki Gemmell 2012

  ‘Anonymity’ first appeared in Honestly: Notes on Life

  Nikki Gemmell asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

  A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

  This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead is entirely coincidental.

  All rights reserved under International Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

  Illustrations by Jo Walker

  Cover photograph © Mat Taylor

  Ebook Edition © MAY 2013 ISBN: 9780007516605

  Version: 2013-08-07

  About the Publisher

  Australia

  HarperCollins Publishers (Australia) Pty. Ltd.

  Level 13, 201 Elizabeth Street

  Sydney, NSW 2000, Australia

  http://www.harpercollins.com.au/ebooks

  Canada

  HarperCollins Canada

  2 Bloor Street East – 20th Floor

  Toronto, ON, M4W, 1A8, Canada

  http://www.harpercollins.ca

  New Zealand

  HarperCollins Publishers (New Zealand) Limited

  P.O. Box 1

  Auckland, New Zealand

  http://www.harpercollins.co.nz

  United Kingdom

  HarperCollins Publishers Ltd.

  77-85 Fulham Palace Road

  London, W6 8JB, UK

  http://www.harpercollins.co.uk

  United States

  HarperCollins Publishers Inc.

  10 East 53rd Street

  New York, NY 10022

  http://www.harpercollins.com